Friday, October 16, 2009

The longest month of our lives.

There are moments in life, when twisted turns change your life.For good or for bad, but those experiences always make you wiser . I'm going to tell what happened to my family-(My husband Ruben, My daughter Scarlet, My son Gary and I.

About 3 years ago, some one called my husband at 6 a.m in the morning. It was my brother in law telling my husband that my father in law was very ill and he wanted to see him. he had melanoma, is a tipe of cancer, that can spreed all over your body quickly. My father in law requested that he needed to see his son , maybe for the last time, because he was the only one far away from him. at that moment Ruben, knew that he had to go to meet him.

We went all the way down to Juarez , Mexico. The first thing to do is to get a permit, from the Mexican custom office. But my husband learned that, since he had only a tourist visa he could not have the permit for the two cars. He was desperate in that moment his father was dying and now this problem . But at the exit of the custom office a man started to honk his horn; my husband stopped. He approached to us and and told him."I can help you, I'm a custom officer my self". Ruben thought he was his savior. the men told us he would fix all the papers and permits that we needed.

We stayed for two days in a motel waiting for him to arrived with the papers, and he did, but he send another person, it was another man,so he put the papers on the cars windows, this person , was so nervous, like he was hiding something so Ruben told him ' 'T hank's for everything you are done for us ". The man made a face , like if he was feeling bad for us. Then he just asked for the money and left. They charged us $800.00 dllrs. When we cross, the first custom station. The officers approached to my husband by the window side, and told him, "where are you going guero". (that means Blondie). My husband answered, "To Guadalajara because my father is dying". They looked at him with a face of doubt,and said, "Show me your permits and the cars papers". Ruben did what he was asked to do.

Then they started to laugh and said"This permits are fake, you are going to jail guero". My husband was surprised. He didn't now the papers were fake. He started sobbing and told them, "Please my father is dying, and I need to go and be by his side". They chuckled and said, "If your father is going to die you can't do nothing about it, But maybe we can fix this problem some how". They wanted the things we had inside of our car, like a t.v. set and a d.v.r that Ruben brought to sell for some the expenses of the funeral and the trip, but he told them, "No, am not going to make more mistakes. If you are going to take me to prison just do it " They started to whisper to each other, and then turn to my husband and say "We are going to let you go, so you can return to Juarez, and fix your problem".

Maybe those officers touch their hearts, I would never know. We returned to Juarez and tried to sell our cars , but no one offered a fair price. So we decided,to go to the airport and take a plane, but they didn't had flights that day.

Ruben decided to rent a van and leave are cars at the airport parking lot. The car that we rented had license plate of Coahuila, Mex, so nobody stooped us in the way to Guadalajara. It took us 32 hours to be in the city, we rode all the way to the hospital of Guzman, city were my father in law was. My husband got inside of the room looked at his father, for the first time in 6 years and told him "It's me Ruben don't you re recognize me", but he couldn't focus his sight and he couldn't speak either, he moved his eyes side ways like wondering where his son was, Ruben approached near him and gave him a kiss and whispered in the ear, " Don't be afraid of dead dad because you're going to be better with god in heaven", and your agony is going to end.

With a broken eye a drop of tear fell down to his cheek. He was breathing fast at first but when Ruben told him all those words, while he caressed his face and later hug him, he started to breath more calmed. When I entered to his room and sow him, I started to yelled and broke in tears, while my mother in law was holding me I stared to asked with a broken voice " why God let people suffer like this ". He wasn't my father but it hurt like he was my blood. Maybe from another life , don't ask me why but it hurt so deep inside of my heart and I only knew him for about a month but he already had a place in my life.

That night we went to rest, waiting for tomorrow to see him again, but we found out he just passed away. Ruben and his siblings prepared everything for the funeral, many people came to my husband childhood house, to pray for my father in law soul, that's the way Catholic people in Mexico, are accustomed to. While the people were inside , I had to wait in are car with my son, because he was to restless and he'll made noise inside of the house and could annoy the guest. So we waited out side for about 10 hrs until next morning. Next day it was time to go to the cemetery to say the last prayer and the last good bye. We spended 1 more day and later we returned to Juarez for our cars and to returned the rented car.

Next morning my sister's husband arrived by airplane to Juarez, he came to help us because he is a resident of U.S.A. And he could easily take the cars to California. We traveled by bus to Tijuana and I was able to see my sister that I miss so much, we stayed for two weeks then we cross San Isidro border by the sentry box everything was getting better, so we went to visit my mom, she lives at Bonita, California. I was so happy to see her because I miss her so much. But we had to say good bye again.

After that we headed to San Bernardino Cal. where my husband's aunt lives, she loaned us some money because we thought to take our children to Disney land, I thought they could relaxed and forget the hard moments of these unfortunate events, wish in they struggled, most of it my youngest one, he was 2 years old at that time. I have to say " They had the best time of their lives". My little son was surprised of the parade and the rides, but his big sister felt if she was at home , because she had gone before.

We were ready to go to our home at Colorado Springs, so we hit the road. We had the two cars and everything was almost O.K. because with the lost of my father in law my poor husband didn't have time to grief. He looked so strong, he is the kind of man that doesn't cry.

We were at the road and passing the last tunnel, we thought now we are o.k because this is Golden, Colorado. We could see the city view of Denver, Colorado the lights twinkling in the dark of the night, all of the sudden the car that we were towing, slipped with the icy road and sweep us away it made the car to crush in to a cement wall, close to the deep ravine . I just closed my eyes and "Said what ever you want for us, it's o.k with me dear God" and my husband said "Please help us God".

The car we were towing got detached from the car we were riding and roll over and ended destroyed. When I opened my eyes I toughed we were dead but surprising every body was fine, physically but emotionally every body was destroyed. I jumped out of the car opened the door and grabbed my son's car seat with him on it, I ran to a safer place because the cars were passing be so fast, my husband grabbed my daughter by the broken window.

It was like if dead was following us, no body wanted to stop it was 3am and then a Grand Caravan pulled over at the road shoulder. It was a elder gentleman he looked worry for us , he asked us " every body its o.k ? do you need help?". He happened to be a ex police man. When the ambulance and the firefighters came over, my husband was in a shock he couldn't speak he was just holding my son like staring with his sight lost , with his big green eyes wide open. I did all the talking with the officers, paramedics and the fire fighters.

They asked me "Is every body o.k" and I answered yes and then they depart . The gentleman who stopped, give us a ride to Denver we stayed in a hotel waiting for a friend to pick us up at 6:00 we were on are way to Colorado Springs. Finally once we were in Springs we start all over again with no money and no cars "Thank God we pay in advance the rent of the apartment and I left food in the frizzier " (The most important thing was that we were alive).

My poor son ended with postraumatic stress, but he is much better now and mi daughter cried for six months, my husband didn't had time to Griff and sometimes his eyes turn red when he start to remember his papa and his home town. The bruises of are body disappear, but the ones we have inside are hearts and memory, those just time will erase them. (So always try to be positive, because in a blink of an eye life can change. ) Things that I learned: to be more stronger, less naive, to save money and be grateful for every thing I have.

"Dedicated to an angel that watch for all of us from heaven " Porfirio Guizar De La Cruz .


sue said...

Wow. Wow.
Haida, you have documented here a very important, albeit difficult, part of your life. I hope that the telling of the story helped you to deal with some of the emotions about these events.
Keep writing!!!

Elena E said...

whooo!What a story.It is so sad. Sometimes live turn crazy, but there is always I meaning of why those things happened. The most important thing is that you always kept positive for your husband and your kids.I'm so proud of you Haida.

marina said...

I am sorry for your father in law lost you are very strong and your husband much bad things happened to you, but thanks to God you come back very well..

patrick said...

Wow, I am so sorry for you, your husband, and your kids. That's very sad dealing with death is hard but in time everything will get better trust me...

unity said...

That was a very interesting story.Sorry about his father.

Laura said...

Haida,your story It's so sad but sometimes there are moments in the life when the things not always going well,but we need to be possitives and keep going you are a great person with a big smile.Thank you for share your story, and Godbless you.

lam said...

Thanks for your sharing!
I am operateing Wedding Dress Shops and Christian Louboutin Shoes, you may find you favorite there if you have a look. I believe everyone have a lovely babe to dress up, just like my wife. There is my shoes:
Christian Louboutin Shoes
Christian Louboutin Pumps
Wedding Dress Shops
Sorry for the bother, God bless you.